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Gemini Man Being Hot and Cold when it Comes to Love

Are you involved with a Gemini man but have noticed that sometimes he’s all hot to trot with you one minute but then another time he seems rather reserved or is pulling back from you? Here are the things that could be causing this.

Going Too Fast

Gemini men like to take their time to build a relationship. They are often not commitment oriented in the first place but if they decide on taking that plunge, they want to make sure it’s someone who they can rely on.

To really know if the person they are choosing is that right lady; he has to take his time. He’ll think things over, weigh his options, and try to make sure that he’s on the right track.

If you try to push him too quickly; he will likely start to clam up and pull back. He doesn’t want a woman who’s going to try to coax him into marriage, a deeper commitment, or getting too close if he isn’t ready.

The last thing he wants is to feel tied down before he’s ready. He also will not appreciate a woman who comes on too strong or displays clingy types of behavior. If he sees those signs; he will absolutely withdraw.

Not Independent Enough

Gemini man being hot and cold

Gemini men are not the type of guys that want to be with a woman who is codependent. He needs a bit of personal freedom where he spends time alone or with other people outside of you.

He appreciates a little solitude or spending time with friends. He may enjoy guys night out or something fun he can do with his friends or family. If you feel he’s blowing you off or doesn’t want to be with you; he’s not the right guy for you.

He isn’t doing these things because he doesn’t care about you. He is who he is and he really does better with a woman who can hold her own and doesn’t NEED him to be with her constantly.

Spending time away from him doing your own thing will win him over better than you making him feel bad for doing things or wanting time alone. He’s built a bit different than most other men.

Let him see that you don’t need him. He’ll be far more turned on and far less than likely to turn cold toward you. He’ll keep that heat burning with you and want to find out more.

No Mystery

Gemini men love mysterious women. If he was hot with you and is now starting to cool off with you; it could be that you’ve told him too much too soon. He doesn’t want to know everything about you right away.

You have to give him a bite here and there and make him work for more information. It makes it more exciting for him to learn about you over time. If you’ve been too up front with all of who you are; he will likely become bored.

Boredom will always cause a Gemini man to scatter. Even if he asks a lot of questions; you can answer them but don’t tell him the whole story behind your answers.

Giving him information over time will give you better results at winning the heart of your Gemini man. He’ll eat it up and keep him stimulated. Take each day as it comes and let things grow over time.

Pace Yourself

While Gemini men love sex like anyone else; they tend to not make it as much as a priority as some others. He has his own set of rules when it comes to intimacy. If you try to get into his intimacy zone too quickly; he may shut you down.

I’m not saying he’s a prude because he’s actually very far from it. He loves sex and isn’t jealous at all which makes him open to doing things like experimental sex, group sex, or open relationships.

However; if you start wanting him too much all the time, telling him you’re feeling deeply for him, or getting basically mushy; he’ll see this as you becoming dependent on him emotionally.

The sex, he doesn’t mine. The emotions; he won’t do well with at all. He has to know you for quite awhile before he’s willing to share emotions. Even then; he’s not that good at it.

This goes back to him not being into women who are needy. You’d be doing yourself no favor by thinking that you can win his love over by sexing him up and doing it well.

Sex isn’t something that will get him to fall for you. When a Gemini man falls in love it’s for other qualities a woman possesses such as independence, intelligence, social skills, and spontaneity.

Moods Always Play a Role

Gemini man being hot and cold

Always remember that the Gemini man has mood swings. He is after all the “twin” of the zodiac. He is one way one day and then different on another day. That means that he could be hot one day and then cold on another.

So this is something that you always have to consider. He can change moods at any time on any day and can make him seem interested or not so interested. This can and will play a huge role in the mood of a Gemini man.

It’s always really important to fully get to know your Gemini guy before you make any assumptions. In fact; it may help your relationship succeed if you were to get to know what Gemini men are really like.

Granted; each one will be slightly different but there are some staples that Gemini men do seem to share. If you would like know what those may be; click here to find out more about the Gemini Man.

I truly hope that this helps explain why Gemini men can be rather touch and go sometimes. I realize that it can be rather frustrating. Just remember patience is the key.

Share your story (or situation) with our community in the comment section below (don’t worry, it’s anonymous).

Wishing you all the luck of the universe

Your friend and Relationship Astrologer,

Anna Kovach

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13 thoughts on “Gemini Man Being Hot and Cold when it Comes to Love

  1. I know a Gemini guy from past 4 years. At the beginning we were not friends but gradually he started showing interest in me and we became friends. Last few months he was very close to me, open to inform personal details and we used to chat regularly on instant messaging and after office. But every time I asked him to go put with me he gave some excuse and denied. Last month as we were chatting I again asked and he denied. From that day onwards he does not message me. He still speaks with me at office and sometimes is personal like before. I am not able to understand what’s the matter. When asked he said he is in no other relationship.

    1. If this guy is very masculine, he will be put off by a woman who is not mysterious (you have revealed too much about yourself) and is chasing him. I am pretty feminine and by default, don’t chase men. I was also with a Gemini guy who pretty much insisted that I do the chasing – calling him, planning dates etc. He even went as far as saying that “should have told him about my feelings” before we got together 0_0. Needless to say, I ended up leaving him.

  2. This is so spot on, it is crazy. I have known this Gemini guy for almost 30 years. He is exactly like this but unfortunately, I did not know this until it was too late!!! We started out as friends but he wanted to date me since we were teenagers and I finally gave him a chance 5 years ago. Before him, I had not dated anyone for 3 years and wanted to be in a serious relationship, which he knew. A few months after dating, I fell madly in love with him and started showing it and he told me he was not ready to be in a relationship! After time, I started noticing, telling him how I felt about him and us was what kept driving him away….even though he pursued me for 20 years!
    I am a Scorpio and when I am in love, I am very open about my feelings, serious about commitment and want to spend time with my guy. All of which are apparently a turn off for him.
    The last 5 years have been hell trying to get over him and move on (he will not let me and I have tried everything!) but I still love him. It has been 5 years and the only thing he is consistent about is being inconsistent and saying one thing and the next day saying or doing the opposite. I am in no way needy or want someone to be up under me all of the time but I absolutely need to know how someone feels about me and feel that security and he does not understand that, I do not think he knows the difference between clinginess and a genuine emotional connection. His flightiness drives me insane and makes me feel like he does not really love me like he says. I know him being a Gemini and fitting these traits to a T is just him being him, but I cannot understand how you claim to love someone but only show it sometimes and after 5 years still indecisive about if they want to be with you or not.
    Honestly, I wish I could invent a time machine and go back to the day that I decided to give him a chance and just stay friends. I am stuck in love with someone that treats me like they are madly in love with me one day and the next acts like they can take me or leave me. I do not know anyone woman that is cool with a ‘relationship’ like that whether they are compatible based on astrology signs or not.

    1. You are stuck in love with the person you want him to be not the selfish creep he really is.
      Have some self respect, ditch him, he does not care for you, he is dangling you on a string.Ignore his texts,ignore him, and if you still want him walk away. If he comes after you, as he surely will because he hates a taste of his own medicine tell him it marriage or nothing.
      Get out there, stop wasting your life. The possibility is that he is doing the same to another woman.
      Life is too short to waste in on a Gemini man.

  3. I have had one chasing me that found me on facebook. I finally relented and met him once last year. He was absent afterward. He later continued to pursue me for quite a while and after I gave him many excuses, he gave up. A few months afterward, he told me that he made a big mistake giving me up. We chatted off and on for about a month while he was on the road. When he got back, still I made excuses. I finally decided to see him and at least this time, he checked in with me via messenger, a little chatting back and forth and in less than a week, he hasn’t read my last couple of messages. I am not needy. I am definitely self-sufficient and don’t need a man to take care of me but I certainly don’t understand him coming on so strong and then disappearing again. I was willing to see him again and definitely didn’t expect it to be immediate. I have my own stuff going on but at this point, if he hits me up,, I feel like I am his last choice. I can’t understand him and don’t know him at all. Almost feel sorry for him. I don’t know what to do. I certainly won’t message him again. Don’t know if I will put myself through seeing him again. Unless, this is definitely normal for a gemini

    1. Honestly this is so spot on
      His up and down like a yoyo
      one minute his all over me wants me very sexual towards me very cute
      then he goes really cold and says his busy ect iv just had to block him as he ignored me about meeting I gave him two chances to tell me whats happening and he didn’t so I had to block him and I was gutted but its not fair on me I didn’t do it in a childish way tho and I also hope he seeks abit of help as his drinking a lot recently…
      his blocked me in the past and unblocked me because he felt under stress and he was sorry ect
      iv never met a man with such intense mood swings

      1. Hi Kathleen!

        Yes they do have mood swings. It’s important to find a formula that works with your Gemini man. If you know he’s being moody just simply try to put off any conversation you want to have until he’s in a better mood. You can also try to express things logically instead of emotionally. This may help him listen a whole lot better as well. Naturally if he’s being childish and unsettled then maybe he’s not the right one for you. Trust your gut and do what is right for yourself sweetheart!

  4. I am a Gemini and I finally decided to give Gemini a shot lol. We talked for awhile until we decided to meet and things went well. We had so much stuff in common. We recently hung out and got intimate. He was good in bed and I liked it of course. Day ended and we aparted and before we left he came towards me to give me a kiss. He has not reach out to me since Saturday morning!! I am not going to be the first person to reach to him if that is what he wants. Awhile back he went a week without contacting me and then he contacted me again. He said how bad he felt for not reaching but he felt weird because he thought I didn’t like him. I am leaving him to process his feelings. I am not reaching out to him I already have done enough. Man are hard period. They just never know what they want. As a Gemini I am independent and I don’t need a man to take care of me and I will not hit up a man if they don’t want me. I don’t chase men!! Men chase the woman.

    1. Hi Lina!

      Thank you for sharing your experience. Typically Gemini can work well with another Gemini but they can also at times, cancel each other out. Yes, the men tend to be more dramatic. Not all men chase women though. However, he could end up doing just that because he digs you and ignoring him will make him want more. Do what is right for you though! I’m proud of you!

  5. I’m a Sagittarius and was dating a Gemini man. We got on so well both same humor, great sex.
    But he then started to go hot & cold. It got so annoying to the point when he got stupid drunk one night I just blocked him I said I’m done with this and he said he was done too. After 3 months he came back apologized and we tried to start afresh everything seemed to be going well. Then bam lock down happened, he went hot and cold again I asked him if everything was ok or perhaps his met someone else why his like this. He completely flipped at me said I was crazy, paranoid & told me to move on, he kept me on Snapchat for a few days and would send me messages on there asking if I was ok and saying I was really stunning I said thank you. Then the next day he completely blocked me. I have now been blocked for a week and not sure if he will unblock me so we can meet up and properly talk. What would you suggest I do? Give him space to unblock me?

    1. I am a sagitarius female and i met a gemini man before lock down. At the first date, i knew he was a lying loser. He wanted women to treat him like how women are courted in a relationship. i stayed friends with him. he invented all kinds of stories and every time i questioned the information , he did the blocking/ unblocking crap and asked me to apologize. I refused to do that so he went crying to his dad. Then he called me crazy. I pissed him off so badly so that he would run away on his own. Run for your lifeunless you want to be melania trump.

    2. Im currently seeing a married gemini guy he took me out and we have had sex a few times but he plays hot and cold on me thinks im sleeping with someone else which im not was worried about me when off sick cancelled a couple of times im totallt confused on his feelings

  6. Hi, I am currently dating a guy and also been dealing with the hot and cold behaviour. It’s a nightmare but when it’s good it’s magic!

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